This is one solid year for a lady. To be 30 is to have a stable job that pays the bills, a car with which one can cruise, a husband that gives one lots of joy, romance and flowers, and maybe children – one or two of them. But this is life, hence not many people get what they want when they want it.
In the same vein, not many ladies who are 30 and above have a well paying job, a nice ride, and most importantly, some ladies above this age might not be married with beautiful kids to show for it.
A situation like this can be rather depressing for these ladies because of the societal strings usually attached to marriage. While getting married early is not usually appreciated, not being married at age 30 is also a big deal.
Knowing just this, Legit.ng decided to do a feasibility study into the general consensus about women who are above 30 and are yet to be married. But even more, the research made was also designed to churn out useful tips ladies yet to be married above this age can work on.
From the questions asked by Legit.ng on all our official Facebook pages and the answers dished out by many Nigerians, here are six tips to ladies above 30 who are yet to be married.
1. Be patient
Wanting to get married is a good thing early is a good thing but getting married to the wrong guy or in a terribly wrong circumstance is not. For ladies who have not yet found that right man by age 30, one useful advice is that they should exercise patience. The need not to rush into a marriage of chance cannot be overstated.
Some Nigerians gave just this tip in their comments:
2. Don’t yield to pressure
It’s one thing to wait and be expectant, it is yet another thing to yield to the arising pressure from people: parents, friends, relatives, colleagues etc. These people can be quite imposing due to their concern for a person.
Hence, they might make all sorts of suggestions, both spiritual and material advice, that they think might help someone get the man she needs. While it is good to listen to the positive tips, negative counsels that are shady and dark on the outlook should be avoided.
A lot of Nigerians has this to say with regards to this matter:
3. Examine yourself
One basic truth about life is that nothing comes from nothing. For a thing to have happened, it must have been preceded by another event. Bringing this home, the fact that a lady is not married at the age she would have expected to be hooked is not something that happens of its own accord.
It has to have been caused by something. Hence, one salient advice to ladies not married above 30 is that they should examine themselves. In light of this, they are required to ask themselves some salient questions or do what is called self reflection.
The questions that should be posed to themselves should bother around the word ‘why’. For what reason do they think they are still single? Does it have something to do with them or the society; are they doing something awfully wrong in all the relationships they have been in; what do all the men they have dated in the past have to say about them?
Answering these questions sincerely in their hearts will bring them closer to a solution.
4. Set the bar lower
This is slightly related to the last tip. Often times, ladies are known to want too much at the prime of their life. When they are young and their beauty is just budding, it is not rare to see them set very unrealistic goals about the man that they intend to marry.
Now, while some get the sort of fancy guy they want for a husband, most people don’t. Not every man can be tall, dark, handsome, wealthy, romantic and independent all at once. Hence, it is important that as ladies who intend to marry age, they should lower the bar for the sort of man they desire.
This is not to say they should accept just any man despite his unruly and unlovable characters, but they should make love, respect, understanding and good morals the yardstick for their potential suitors rather than stay fixed on material needs and expectations.
5. Look good and mingle
A single lady above 30 who has not found The One yet should make waiting look so good by looking so good. Being single is actually tantamount to being pretty, fashionable and absolutely stunning.
The ability to slay and mingle well with others during outdoor events and even in closed settings have given some ladies the opportunity to meet their partners because, indeed, nothing good walks over to someone, it is always met halfway.
Truth be told, marriage is not an achievement, it is not a degree that has to be pursued. It is something that comes at its own time. Hence, it always rather better for ladies who feel time is telling on them to totally just go wild and live.
Realising that life is too short to be wasted getting worried about anything should help in making one aspire to fulfill her dreams, go to desired places, eat the right food and live life to the fullest.
So really, the best advice to give a lady who is above 30 and is still not married is that they should do nothing and just go on to enjoy themselves, live well and simply wait for the right guy to knock on their doorstep. As the quote goes, doing nothing leads to the very best of something.
(Source : Legit.ng & Weetalknaija Daily Post)
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